Just for Fun
LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION!
Who'd choose to live in Coldrain or Dull (both in Perth and Kinross), Fail (South Ayrshire) or Foulbog (Dumfries and Galloway), when you could be living in Puddinglake (Cheshire), Rumbling Bridge (Perth and Kinross), Smug Oak (Hertfordshire) or Broadwoodwidger (Devon).
Instead, why not buy a Bighouse in Highland, which is probably preferable to living in either a Box in Gloucestershire or a Field in Staffordshire. Local amenities are good too - you can Shop in Cornwall, go to Church in Lancashire, or Bank in Hampshire - although you have to go to Herefordshire to use the branch's only Hole-in-the-Wall or to South Ayrshire to arrange Loans - which you might need for a holiday in California (Falkirk, Norfolk), Canada (Hampshire) or even Moscow (East Ayrshire).
For trips out there is a Gallery in Angus, a Hall in East Renfrewshire, a Park in Aberdeenshire, a Garden in Stirling, and of course, there is always a Sale on in Greater Manchester. After a day at Work in Orkney why not pop over to The Bar in West Sussex and order a Beer, or for the more continental types a Frenchbeer, both from Devon. On the way home you can even stop at the Chipshop, also in Devon. At the end of a busy day you can Slepe in Dorset - unless of course you were lucky enough to find a Lover in Wiltshire! (but not from North Yorkshire, as they're still fumbling around in Sexhow…) And remember you are only allowed to Peover Heath on the way home in Cheshire!
Remember - if you do decide to buy a new house, make sure you don't end up with a Stiffkey in Norfolk, beware the Trap in Carmarthenshire, and don't get Stuck in Argyll and Bute, or it could end up Nasty in Hertfordshire! In fact, to avoid cries of "Pity Me" in County Durham you should perhaps decide to Settle in North Yorkshire.